Ask Phil: Questionable Sewing Advice from a Rat Who Demands to Be Heard
Phil recently filed a formal complaint with Human Resources claiming that his voice was “not being heard within the organization.”
We explained that Phil regularly interrupts staff meetings, hides inside fabric bins, and once held an unauthorized press conference from the top of the sewing machine. Phil insisted that this was not the point.
As Vice President of Unexpected Opportunities, he believes he has valuable sewing knowledge to share. HR has therefore approved a new advice column:
Ask Phil! Sewing Advice Column
Ask Phil
Real sewing questions. Surprisingly useful answers. Occasional rat-related recommendations.
Dear Phil,
My fabric keeps shifting while I sew. What should I do?
—Sliding in Seattle
Phil: Have you tried sitting on it?
That is how I keep things from moving.
HR has asked me to clarify that you should not actually sit on your sewing project. Instead, use plenty of pins or sewing clips, and consider basting slippery layers together before stitching.
But for the record, sitting on it would work.
Dear Phil,
How do I stop my seams from coming apart?
—Unraveling in Utah
Phil: Backstitch at the beginning and end of every seam.
I personally reinforce all important structures—seams, snack containers, and the entrance to my office.
A few reverse stitches will secure the thread and keep your seam from unraveling. This is particularly important on plushies because their seams need to withstand stuffing, cuddling, and what Gary calls “routine quality-control tugging.”
Join Creativebug - thousands of sewing, art, craft classes!Dear Phil,
I accidentally sewed the wrong pieces together. Is my project ruined?
—Stressed at the Seam Ripper
Phil: Absolutely not. You have simply discovered an unexpected construction opportunity.
Take a breath, find your seam ripper, and carefully remove the stitches. Work slowly so you don’t cut the fabric.
Mistakes happen. Sometimes you sew an ear on backward. Sometimes you attach a tail to the forehead. Sometimes you approve a policy that allows a rat to submit unlimited HR complaints.
Most things can be fixed.
Dear Phil,
How much stuffing should I put inside my plushie?
—Overstuffed in Ohio
Phil: More.
HR: Phil, please provide an actual answer.
Phil: Fine.
Add small amounts of stuffing at a time. Push it into the corners, arms, legs, ears, and other small areas before filling the larger sections. Keep checking the shape as you work.
Your plushie should feel full and cuddly without stretching the seams.
Unless you are making a cheese wedge. Cheese should always be generously filled.
Dear Phil,
Why does my plushie look lumpy?
—Bumpy in Boston
Phil: First, do not criticize the plushie. It may be sensitive.
Second, pull out any large clumps of stuffing and refill the area using smaller pieces. Gently fluff each piece before adding it, then distribute the stuffing evenly with your fingers or a stuffing tool.
A little patience can smooth out most lumps.
I have requested that this advice not be applied to my own appearance.
Dear Phil,
I’m afraid to cut into my good fabric. What if I make a mistake?
—Nervous in Nashville
Phil: Begin by guarding the fabric for three to five business days. This gives you time to study it and prevents other staff members from using it.
Once you are ready, read through the pattern instructions, check the grain and stretch direction, and make sure every pattern piece is positioned correctly. Pin or weight the pieces securely before cutting.
If you’re still nervous, make a practice version using inexpensive fabric first.
This is called a test project.
I call it “the first draft that Gary is not allowed to inspect.”
Dear Phil,
My sewing project doesn’t look exactly like the picture. Did I do something wrong?
—Comparing in Connecticut
Phil: Does every rat look exactly the same?
No. Some are distinguished executives. Others live behind restaurants.
Your handmade plushie will have its own shape, expression, and personality. That is part of what makes it special. If the seams are secure and you enjoyed making it, you have succeeded.
If one eye is slightly higher than the other, simply say the plushie is inquisitive.
Phil’s Final Sewing Advice
Do not let the fear of making a mistake keep you from sewing.
Fabric can be recut. Seams can be removed. Stuffing can be adjusted. Crooked features often become personality.
And if something goes completely wrong, call it an unexpected opportunity and promote yourself.
It worked for me.
—Phil Rat
Vice President of Unexpected Opportunities
Founder of Ask Phil
Currently prohibited from filing another HR complaint until Monday
Have a sewing question for Phil? Send it our way!
Please be advised that answers may contain genuinely helpful sewing advice, unnecessary references to cheese, and opinions that have not been reviewed by Gary, Director of Quality Assurance.
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